Martha Treats Newsletter
Martha Treats, sent once a month by email, gives you an inspiring learning nugget around completion
and includes an invitation to take action around that learning in your life.
Subscribe for Free Now
Just published: Martha Treat #182
A Habit Worth Quitting
Dividing our attention is simply a habit that is learned and developed and defended as necessary and not a big deal. I have discovered just how big a deal it is!
I am proud to say that this week I finally and successfully completed my 33 consecutive days of not multitasking while on the phone with friends. It took me many stops and starts to get to 33 days in a row, the number of days I am told can change a habit. My unconscious habit of just handling things while talking to a friend would slip in before I would catch it. I was diligent about calling myself on it immediately, with expletives-deleted. And then I would start over at day one. It was humbling as I can usually commit to doing something and not miss a day. In this case I honestly couldn’t do it. It became funny at one point and then I realized that there is nothing funny about splitting my attention.
I am more committed than ever to quitting this habit.
I recently coached a new client who before we started the session had one thing they needed to finish. But they felt compelled to talk to me simultaneously. I let it go on for a while observing the disturbance in my body as they continued to talk and work. It became clear that to stop and simply focus on one thing and letting go of everything else is not easy for them. Their habit is to try to be available to everything every minute and to try to do it all at once which is actually not possible. But we tell ourselves it is and perpetuate the myth.
Another client was asking about how to address all the multiple creative projects in which they want to be involved. I was encouraging them to focus on the one or two projects that use their gifts. I said to them “when you are doing too many things, no one can find you.” It stopped her in her tracks as she experienced the truth of that for her. Then she insisted I write it down and put it in a Treat.
When we divide our attention by spreading ourselves thin and multi-tasking we tend to diminish who we truly are. The people we work with and the people we love want and deserve the fullness of our attention and our creative presence. But more than that I deserve and you deserve the fullness of our own attention.
1. Watch your habitual patterns that might not be serving you and choose one to address.
2. Stop when you notice your attention is split and experience what it feels like inside of you.
3. If a friend is not giving you their full intention, let them know that you value them and would really like to be with them without the distractions.
Share this Treat
Read Previous Treats:
Treat #173 A Kink in the Works
Treat #172 What's Stopping You?
Treat #171 All of Ours to Do
Treat #170 Attitude Adjustment
Treat #169 IN Consciousness
Treat #168 Completing Past our Reactions
Treat #167 Keep Your Dog Leash
Treat #166 The Essential Piece
Treat #165 Day is Done
Treat #164 Do-Nothing Time
Treat #163 Curbside Calm
Treat #162 Pile-Up
Treat #161 Gentle Doing
Treat #160 Freedom in the Discipline
Treat #159 Finding New Routes
Treat #158 Keeping the Awe Alive
Treat #157 "Finishiative"
Treat #156 The Exquisite Sound of the Moment
Treat #155 Up-to-the-minute
Treat #154 Uninviting Interruptions
Treat #153 What's bugging you
Treat #152 Competing Attention
Treat #151 Our Inner Awareness
Treat #150 Spontaneously Fresh and Alive
Treat #149 Without the Push
Treat #148 100% With...
Treat #147 Are You Signaling?
Treat #146 What is Pulling on Your Attention?
Treat #145 Gathering Ourselves Out of Overwhelm
Treat #144 Wonderings – Another Kind of Incomplete
Treat #143 Asking – A New Form of Delegating
Treat #142 Split Attention Payback
Treat #141 Getting All the Way In To Doing
Treat #140 Willingness to Look
Treat #139 Follow Yourself Around
Treat #138 A New Kind of Flow